Hard Rock Schizos

You really can't set your watch to VH1's viewers. How to explain their recent list of "100 Greatest Hard Rock Songs" intersecting at a few points with their own "40 Most Awesomely Bad Metal Songs Ever" countdown (Warrant's "Cherry Pie", Winger's "Seventeen", Autograph's "Turn Up the Radio", and Europe's ultra-weak "The Final Countdown" among them)?

It's bad enough the "100 Greatest" has a bunch of lame hair farmer tunes on there--in addition to the aformentioned songs the cheese factor is upped courtesy of Ratt, Lita Ford, Skid Row, etc--but the inclusion of Survivor's "Eye of the Tiger" is just plain ridiculous.

(Also, is it not much of a coincidence that the hair merchants and/or old-timers rarely have anything positive to say about the '90s entries on the list? Still some bad blood there, huh?)

We're guessing VH1 wants to create a bit of suspense by not announcing on their site which songs made the list, so Stereogum (!) has the rundown of the 100 Greatest here.

RIP

- The passing of Ricardo Montalbán, the Mexican-born actor best known for his roles as Mr. Rourke on TV's Fantasy Island and as the title villain in the second Star Trek movie, The Wrath of Khan, was announced on Jan. 14th. He died in Los Angeles home with no cause of death given. Montalbán was 88 years old.

- Emmy award-winning actor Patrick McGoohan, star and creator of the cult classic TV show The Prisoner, died in Los Angeles on Jan 14th. He was 80.

12 Year Old Boys, Rejoice!

The title of Britney Spears' next single is "If You Seek Amy". Yes, really.

What We're Listening To

BRIAN BLADE & THE FELLOWSHIP BAND Season of Changes (Verve)
HALL & OATES Rock n Soul Pt.1 (RCA)
PELICAN City of Echoes (Hydra Head)
DAVID SYLVIAN Gone to Earth (Virgin)
TEMPLE OF THE DOG -self titled- (A&M)

What are YOU listening to?

What Was and What Should Never Be

After months of speculation and rumor Peter Mensch, manager for Led Zeppelin's Jimmy Page has stated categorically that the legendary British hard rockers are not reuniting--with or without Robert Plant.

"If you didn't see them in 2007...you missed them. It's done. I can't be any clearer than that...They tried out a few singers, but no one worked out...That was it. The whole thing is completely over now."

And how exactly did this turnaround come about? It was practically a done deal and now it's a figment of our collective imagination, is that what Mensch is implying?

Part of us are sighing in relief over the possibility of the reunion turning into a travesty but Mensch's whole stance on this is quite weird, to say the least.

No, Not That 'Crow'

Comedian Steve Martin is releasing an bluegrass album on Jan. 27th. (It'll be an Amazon exclusive for the first 90 days.) A long-time banjo player, Martin will presumably perform some material from The Crow: New Songs for the Five-String Banjo when he hosts Saturday Night Live on Jan. 31st.

What Year is This?

According to Pollstar, the top-grossing tours of 2008 in the US were:

1. Madonna ($105 million)
2. Celine Dion ($94 million)
3. The Eagles ($73.4 million)
4. Kenny Chesney ($72.2 million)
5. Bon Jovi ($70.4 million)
6. Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band ($69.3 million)
7. Neil Diamond ($59.8 million)
8. Rascal Flatts ($55.8 million)
9. The Police ($48 million)
10. Tina Turner ($47.7 million)

We didn't even know Ms. Turner was on the road last year! (We thought she was retired. Seriously.)

Rebels Wit Attitude Excerpt

PopMatters has a taste for those interested in a new book about Nirvana titled Rebels Wit Attitude: Subversive Rock Humorists by author Iain Ellis.

The Big Question: Why Isn't the Music Biz Dead Already

The brave new internet world trumpeted by those who promised a brilliant, record company-free future for up-and-coming artists--or just sought to predict the end of the recording industry--have been scratching their heads lately. The Guardian UK's Music Blog asks the following:

Numerous blogs and blog comments have hailed the internet as the slayer of domineering record labels. Now the "hated" A&R men and women (hated by a lot of unsigned bands, at least) would become obsolete because music fans and artists could bypass traditional ways of connecting with each other. But if the music industry is so screwed, why do young artists keep signing to labels, and major labels at that? Why aren't they all using sites such as Jamendo or self-releasing? Why, when the audience has the choice of tens of millions of tracks, do they still gravitate so heavily towards musicians signed to–mostly major–labels?

Because the "machine"–as imperfect and unscrupulous as it can be–when it works, is incomparable. Sales, promotion, loaded Rolodexes, and financial might all behind you, what newbie is gonna look that in the eye and walk away? Of course, they may be referred to as sell outs by people who expect of artists the kinds of financial compromises they themselves aren't willing to assume, so fuck 'em.

[h/t EarFarm]

Golden Globes Report (oops!)

Actually, we were completely unaware The Golden Globe Awards were last night, so you should get your info elsewhere, like perhaps, here; or here if you want dish and snarkiness.